Saying Farewell

Jacob’s mom, Brenda or Granny to the kids, was diagnosed nearly a year and a half ago with stage 4 colon cancer.  She had had surgery to remove the primary tumor, but the mass that had spread to her liver was inoperable.  She started every other week treatments soon after.

Granny did really well for about a year when her treatments started to be less effective and side effects were greater.  I new treatment began and she continued to to well for a little while.  Just before Thanksgiving this year, the doctors decided to discontinue her treatments because the mass in her liver continued to grow and her liver was failing. 

While we knew that eventually this time would come we were still all pretty devastated at the reality of it.  We spent some time with them (about as much time as it seemed she could handle of our lively family of 6!) over Thanksgiving and she was actually doing pretty well and I think we all really enjoyed our time together.  However, I think this is when it became real for Jacob and I because Granny really looked ill.  As is typical for liver failure, she was very jaundiced.

I shouldn’t speak for Jacob, but I think that the 3ish weeks that passed before Granny passed away was a time for us to reconcile her prognosis with our hopes.  We went from hoping for healing or a significantly longer time together to hoping for peace and physical comfort that she might pass before suffering.  We were granted that hope and she passed away peacefully on December 14.  She had a peaceful passing in her own bed at home alone with Papa holding her hand.

Jacob wanted to speak at her funeral service and he did a really great job.  There wasn’t a dry eye in the church – though that wasn’t the point.  He wanted to express Christ’s love using Brenda’s life as an example and he did it beautifully.

It’s hard to think of a life without Granny, but we are overwhelmed by the sweetness of her peaceful passing.  She was a thoughtful, strong woman who loved her family and possessed a strong faith.  We are most saddened that our children will grow up without further influence and love directly from her, but they will still benefit from the influence she had on the people that remain in their lives.  She will be missed.